I'm sitting on my deck.
The deck that looks out across the road to the beautiful beach of Burleigh.
I spent a year cultivating the right "vibe" -or faith, if you like- to move into this dream of wanting to be living beachside.
My decision to be consistent to walk the beach every day (from mid Feb 2010)was part of making "real" that element of my desired life.
So many other wonderful benefits, pleasures, artworks, blogs, vlogs, radio shows and insights came as a result of the year that followed. You can find many on this site as well. They document the journey under the main title of DIY Designer Living.
Another Year...
So, I moved into my place but then felt somewhat lost.
The work contracts ( singing/playing) I had started to ebb and things became very tight.This happened at a time when my youngest two ( and last remaining at home of 5)children moved out. I had looked forward to the extra $$ to save for a trip overseas and to spend on all sorts of things I'd never had.
Because money dried up, I was forced again to think about to generate more and nothing that I used to do or had previously done was getting any results. I was losing interest in trying and even doing it, if it came. Some thing needed to shift.
However, even if work had continued, I would still have felt plagued by the same inner question that had walked with me ALL my days. And it wasn't so much "Why am I here?" as much as it was "What does it actually look like when I'm fulfilling this 'why?' "
I knew it was spiritual. I knew it was mentoring, musical, artistic and I knew I could help people locate, live and flourish authentically.Since I really didn't know how to walk this out given my life as it had become, I was equally more perplexed than ever.
Two Degrees Off Truth
You see, the only place I'd ever felt was "right" was when I was worshipping God and sharing how his Wisdom was changing my life. When I left church, ten years ago, I was at a loss as to where/how to sue these gifts that were so obviously for "The Body Of Christ"
I had not seen this quite this way before.
This is why I couldn't get this stuff to function to any great degree anywhere else. I tried the Corporate World. I tried New Age Circles. I tried Network Marketing and Social Media. I tried study and teaching...nothing "took" and certainly nothing took my heart. They were all "two degrees off My truth"
Three times in just the last few days, I have been referred to as "a gift" to the Body. The minister on Sunday, pointed me out, spoke of my "ministry" and said "Lisa is a gift" given to help lead people into the Presence of God.
That same day, another lay minister wrote of me saying:
"When Lisa is singing praise & worship she effortlessly carries you along into the tangible prescence of God. It is not something learned or even practised but a true gift given to the body of Christ."
And what it has just prompted in me is a reminding that I have repeatedly said over this past week, that "the gift has always made a way". But the gift is not just what I do ...it is WHO I AM.
The reason I have never felt like a proper fit in any of the many other places it seems I would be a great fit, is because I am a gift to the Body of Christ. I am a ministry gift.
:-)
And why does this help me so much right now? (As revelation always does-helps now!) It makes it easy for me to see and understand "WHO" I need to focus on. In business terms, you could say my "target market". I know who it is I am talking to/for /with.
I was trying to overhaul my website but couldn't even get started. Now, it will be much easier.
It's so funny how we can "know" something but then we can "see and know" it more and it brings faith and empowerment, insight and instruction. I knew I felt called back to ministry and in a much more significant way but thinking of myself as "a gift to the Body" really sheds a light on this in a more profound way. Another point that had been percolating around inside me was the understanding of commitment and that it cannot help but promote exclusivity. The Whole idea of "niche marketing" is based upon this premise. You become the expert of your chosen field. I could never decided how to select and define that for myself. But I always knew...it's worship. And it's obvious that worship doesn't really relate to anyone but those that know and love God as father. It just wouldn't mean anything to anyone else. And did you know that Gods seeks worshippers who worship Him in spirit and in truth? Jn 4:23 God SEEKS them!
"Do not take the children's bread and give it to the dogs". The term "dog" simply refers to those outside the covenant and was quoted by Jesus in reference to the distinction between Jews and Gentiles. After Jesus' death and resurrection the covenant would be open to all but in this passage, the Gentile Jesus was addressing answered , "Yes Lord, but even the dog gets the crumbs that fall from the Master's table." That man received his desire. Jesus ministered to any and ALL that came to him but He was sent to the children of Isreal-those under the Law first.
It's easy enough for anyone to become a "child" now and participate in the covenant God has made with Jesus, sealed in his own blood.
In understanding myself as "a gift to the Body", I know exactly who I'm speaking to and what my words should do-and my being is flooded with that wonderful sense of his Blessed Assurance once more.
:-)
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